Percy in the Kichen?
by gilly boy
Summary: Nah, I'm kidding. This is a Truth or Dare show that has been removed twice, which I'm sick of. You can send in truths or dares that you want these guys to preform and I will make sure it happens. BTW: don't report me for this, your just ruining other people's enjoyment.
1. episode 1: opening night

**I'm only going to say this once, I don't own the characters from PJO, Rick does.**

**Inpired by someone I can't remember.**

"Hey gilly boy, the show is going to start soon, better get on there," said the manager.

"I'll be there in a sec," I said putting my blue bandana and black leather biker jacket on.

"Alright but the crowd's getting restless," he said.

"Of course, who wouldn't pass up the chance to meet the guy who saved the world?"

Satisfied with the look, I walked out on stage.

"Hello people! For those of you who have been on my profile, which I doubt, I know I shouldn't be doing this but I just couldn't resist! But enough about me, time to introduce the players, with the approval of Chiron, these demigods have from camp to be here today; with the delay of monsters. Now, without further ado, please welcome Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood, Clarisse La Rue, Nico Di Angelo, Thalia Grace, and Conner and Travis Stoll." As I called their names, they came and took a seat on the couches; Conner and Travis did a peace signs coming in. "Last, but certainly not least, the guy we've all been waiting for, Percy Jackson!" The crowd went wild when he came out; I had to cover my ears to keep from going deaf.

"Aren't you a little young to be doing this?" asked Annabeth.

"Aren't you a little young to be saving the world?" I countered. That shut her up.

"Wow, I'm impressed, not many people can do that," said Thalia.

"Hey, it just occurred to me that if we're all here, wouldn't there be more likely an attack?" asked Grover.

"Oh, I wouldn't worry about that," I said, taking a seat at my desk. "I asked Carter and Sadie to put up a spell to cover you and any other demigods in the building before you got here."

"Who are Carter and Sadie?" asked Conner or was it Travis.

"You'll see, eventually," I said with a grin.

"I don't think I like the sound of that," said Nico.

"Alright enough said; did you guys fill out the paper work?" I asked.

"Yeah, we're not going to sue you or the show," said Percy.

"You shear on the River Styx that you will not ask your godly parents to vaporize or change me for anything on the show and not kill me with those weapons of yours," I said.

"We swear," everyone said and thunder rumbled nearby.

"Then let's get started! People review some truths and dares you want these guys to perform and I will make that happen!" _This is going to be fun_, I thought.

**I'm serious, don't report me for this, your just ruining other people's fun. I hope you enjoy, and have a nice life.**


	2. episode 2

"Welcom back folks," I called. "To answer a question I've been asked, people report this because they're just goody-goodies that like following the rules. Which makes me sick to my stomach."

"No but rules are rules," said Grover.

"Argh, I hate rules," I muttered. I would say that Percy, Annabeth, and Tyson also broke the rules but they had better reasons than I do so I can't use that. "Let's just get to the game."

"First up is Goddess of Jasper who says:

Oh this should be good!  
Can Annabeth burn her blueprints, and wear a shirt that says Athena Sucks!

Percy has to eat seafood in front of his father.

Nico has to tapdance with skeletons!

these are all dares!"

"What? No, not my blueprints!" cried Annabeth.

"You have them on the laptop, don't you?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Then you shouldn't have a problem burning copies and here's the shirt," I said. "You can shred it after the show. Yo Liam, bring in the blueprints!"

Scrolls floated in as the demigods and the audience stared wide-eyed.

"What is that?" asked Clarisse.

"That is ghost brother Liam; he may have started out as an imaginary friend till later I found out that there was supposed to be a kid before me." I shrugged. "Thanks Liam," pressing a button and a fire pit rose up."

"How did you know she would ask that?" asked Thalia.

"I didn't but I had that prepared for other people later on. This might be the only time I use it," I answered, handing Annabeth the scrolls. She looked about ready to cry, I could relate to that. She dropped them and flames that turned the material into ash. Tears began to fall. Taking her seat next to Percy, he rubbed her back in a comforting manner, it looked quite touching.

Too bad I had to interrupt, "Sorry but Percy's got to go, here's some sushi." I hand him the sushi and push off out the door.

"While Percy's on his way; Nico how 'bout some skeletons?" I asked.

"Alright but some people might a heart attack," he said, snapping his fingers and four skeletons clawed out. Nico must have had two left feet because he stumbled a few times.

Some people were laughing others cracked a smile.

"Alrighty then that was an excellent performance, let's check up on Percy."

A screen came down and it showed Percy hiding behind a rock while Poseidon was searching for him, he did not look happy.

"Does anyone here know how to restrain a god?" I asked.

Annabeth got up and walked out. Twenty minutes later they came back with a few cuts but nothing major.

"Okay! Let's get a move on people; aquamarine girl 35 asks:

truth for percy jackson: how would you feel if i was your sister? Because i think i have a lot of proof that i am.

truth for Thalia: do you think that if you ask yes or no questions to lord Zues, that he will answer with lightning durring a storm?"

"I hardly know you but it would be nice to share a cabin, I'm sure Tyson will be happy to have a sister," answered Percy.

"Yes, I tried that a few times and he answers most of the time," replied Thalia.

"Nothing extreme so far," I said. "Tratie-Zuthara-and-Perlia-Fan says:

I dare Percy and Thalia to do 60 mins. in Heaven and something has to happen.  
I dare Nico to sing the Happy Song. Like, "I am really special cause there's only one of me". That song.  
I dare Clarrise and Connor to kiss for 10 seconds.  
Ask Travis what he thinks of Katie.  
Ask Annabeth if she approves of Pothena.  
Ask the Stolls what they think of Heartemis. {Hermes and Artemis}"

"You've got to be kidding me! Lady Artemis will surely hunt me down till the end of my days," cried Thalia.

"It's that or the fan room," I replied.

"I'm taking the fan room," replied Thalia.

"Alright, but this might not turn out too well," I muttered. Thalia came back five minutes later with ripped up clothes and messed up hair. "Is that a new fashion statement?" I teased which earned me a glare.

"Do I really have to?" asked Nico.

"Yes, unless you want to end up like Thalia over there, here's the mike." Nico is not the best singer out there; I'm saying this because he sounds like a banshee. "Well that was… interesting; Clarisse, Conner make-out time."

"When I find you, Tratie-Zuthara-and-Perlia-Fan, I'm going to feed your guts to the dogs," shouted Clarisse.

Conner pretended to look a little hurt, "Oh, I'm not that bad of a kisser am I?"

"Stop flirting and get moving!" I shouted, they made-out for twelve seconds, two seconds longer than needed. Some people in the audience were taking pictures.

"That was just horrid," complained Clarisse.

"Maybe to you but the rest of us enjoyed it, I just hope you can explain to Chris about the incident that just taken place. I forgot to mention that I asked the Hephaestus cabin to make a shield like TV so that your fellow campers can enjoy the show, oh and Mount Olympus is watching too."

Clarisse turned red as a tomato, while Conner was chuckling.

"Travis, what do you think of Katie?" I asked.

"Fine, I guess," he wasn't too sure.

"I don't really approve of Pothena, they're rivals, put them in the same room and there is bond to be chaos; causing problems for the mortals," answered Annabeth.

"I think that if dad was able to get Artemis, that would be an ultimate accomplishment," said Conner.

"But Artemis is a tough nut, she's more likely to kill him, oh wait, no she can't," smirk Travis.

"Moving on, this one is from Irithi Keiko:

Hi I'm the sunset blessed child! That's what my name means in japaneese.  
Oh and btw, why? Are you like a teenager or something? I think it's okay to give out your age as long as you dont give out you full name. Look at my name! It's not even my real name, it's what my mom would have named me bit my dad said no.  
So I dare Thalia to go on the roof and dance to sorry for party rockin by LMFAO.  
I dare annabeth to be in love with Edward from twilight  
I truth nico if he can see into the future.  
Oh also, you are a guy right?  
Bye!

"Nice name, Japanese huh? My name translated from Japanese means flower" (wow, blond moment and I'm not even blond). "Yes I am a teenager, 15 to be precise and no I am not a guy. When I read that I couldn't help laughing, you're the first one that has asked that," I said. "Thalia, there's a ladder over to your left; it would lead you to the roof."

She grumbled something I couldn't hear and went up. The screen got pulled down and she was dancing with the music; a few mortals walking by taking a few photos and videos.

I pulled out a picture of Edward and Annabeth went fan crazy.

"Nico, can you see the future?" I asked, leaning forward a bit.

"No, and why do you ask Irithi Keiko?" he answered.

"Mm… now that I think about it, I forgot to invite Rachel," face-palming myself. "That was just stupid of me."

"Everyone has their moments," said Grover.

"You're lucky this time, no one dared you to do anything," I muttered. "Last dare and then the shows over for today; this from Daughter of Wisdom and Music:

OOOOH! OKAY, PERCY MUST KISS THALIA IN FRONT OF ARTEMIS AND ANNABETH!"

Artemis is going to kill me for this. "Hey Artemis, Thalia has a surprise for you!"

Before I knew it, she was suddenly in front me, "what is it gilly boy, have you considered my offer?"

"Yes I've considered it, and my answer is still no, just turn around."

Thalia had grabbed Percy by the shirt, mouths connected, and he looked as stiff as cardboard. Annabeth turned bright red and was biting her lip. Artemis looked furious, she was about to change Thalia into something.

"Someone restrain her!" I cried.

It all happened really fast, Clarisse tackled Artemis and I was searching through drewers for a net (made of celestial bronze, thank you Hephustus). If it was even possible, Artemis looked even more furious; the guys didn't jump in because we all know how much she hates males.

"Do you Artemis swear on the river styx that you will not cause harm to Thalia in any way?"

She grumbled a curse or two but reluctantly agreed. As soon as we releashed her from the net, she disapeared.

"One thing before the show is over, no more dares for Thalia to kiss someone in front of Artemis again, 'cause next time I don't think we will get away so easily. Bye!"

**A/N: I've decided I'm going to keep continuing the show no matter what. Next episode I will bring in my co-host, along with Rachel. And Turtle wing meep, it is not a cross over, I only mentioned Carter and Sadie. They'll appear sometime later.**


	3. episode 3

"Is it safe?" I questioned, peeping out from under my desk.

"Yes now get out from under there, you big wimp," said Clarisse.

"Hey, I know Artemis will blast me to smithereens at any moment. Plus, if I'm not careful, the 'police' users will take off my show again."

"Oh quit whinning gilly, honestly why would Lady Artemis ask you to become a hunter?" asked Thalia, clearly frustrated.

"I do not whine! And gee maybe it's because of the hunters you lost during the war!" As soon as those words came out of my big mouth, I knew I'd regret it. It was a suensitive spot for Thalia, knowing that she led them to their grave.

The next thing I know, an arrow was ludged next to my head. (Now I know how Butch feels.)

"Please tell me those arrows can't kill a mortal," I gulped.

She didn't answer but just looking at the arrows would have anyone intimidated; Thalia is not afraid to kill.

"Can we move before Thalia turns the host into a shushcabob," another fabulous piece of wisdom from Annabeth.

"Oh yeah, here's my co-host Waffles and the oricle herself, Rachel Elizabeth Dare!"

"I am the new chef around here and those noodles aren't going to cook themselves," said my clone.

"We're not on a cooking show," said Clarisse.

"We're not?" she asked stupidly, which earned a few laughs from the audience.

In my opinion, Waffles is almost a perfect copy. Her long dark brown hair in contrast to my shoulder-length and big brown eyes that seem to pop out of her head sometimes.

"Finally, she wouldn't shup up about cupcakes," said Rachel, looking like she was having a head ache.

"I know what you mean, I had to deal with her everyday since she was born; trust me, it's a nightmare." (-.-) "Now let's move on to some dares, first one if from Ilovebookssomuch who says:

'Cool! This is really funny to read, especially the dares! I dare Grover to curse Pan and say he's stupid. And a truth for Clarisse: Why do you like Chris?'"

Gover looked shocked but he cursed in some animal tongue but I think he directed some at Ilovebookssomuch.

"Pan is stu~pid," said Waffles.

"You didn't have to say that," I said.

She didn't reply but ran backstage for a cupcake Liam was holding.

Grover mumbled something I couldn't hear.

"Speak up," said Conner.

"So the rest of us can hear," finished Travis.

"Pan's an idiot!" shouted Grover.

Insert crickets.

"Okay, not that we've got that out of the way; Clarisse, why is Chris so special?"

Clarisse had a really light blush that was barely noticeable. "He has a lot of guts, he came out of the labrynth in one piece although his sanity didn't last long. If it were me, I'd come back proud but looking at Chris that broken, it didn't seem like a good victory for a hero so I thought I could cheered him up a bit."

"Wow," I said. "I did not take you as that kind of person."

"You have a problem with that, punk?" she growled.

"No," hands raised is surrender. "Anyways, next is Person saying:

'I dare Annabeth and Percy 2 hours in heaven I dare Conner and travis to dress up as starawar characters and reenact the all the movies and the last for thaila I dare her to wear all Barbie cloths that say I'm a Barbie girl I heart Barbie and sing the song I'm a Barbie girl all day'"

"What closet?" asked Percy.

"This one," right on cue, a box fell near the exit. "Thanks Hermes, Liam will pay you in a sec."

_Why do I have to pay?_ he he complained.

"Because you still have a few drachmas after we went through the Underworld."

Everyone, except Nico, stared at me.

"What, I can't talk to my brother? Oh Liam, could you take that backstage, its taking up a lot of room. Also grab some of costumes in there, I forgot to order those before the show started," I explained.

_What am I, your servent?_

I ignored him.

"You remember to bring a fire pit but not a costume closet?" asked Nico.

"Yup, pretty much," if I was an anime, I'd sweat drop. "Percy, Annabeth could you just go so we could move on."

Liam handed Conner and Travis the costumes along with their scripts. I honestly haven't ever watched the Star Wars movies before but it seems like the Stolls have and they did a pretty good job acting.

During their preformance, Percy and Annabeth came back. After a few hours, Conner and Travis took their bows and went backstage.

Liam handed Thalia the clothes which she reluctently put on and sang. That's going to get annoying.

"Next is morgue:

'I dare Annabeth to kiss percy in front of all the gods and goddesses and their children.'"

"You called," said Aphrodite.

"We were watching," explained Apollo.

Figures.

Chiron and the campers came in. Man, this dare should have taken place in town square.

Annabeth and Percy looked really embarrassed but they did it anyway. Athena frowned, Apollo winked at them, Aphrodite and her kids either cood or giggled, Artemis looked like she was trying not to gag, Dionysus just rolled his eyes, and Poseidon smiled; the rest didn't care. I think I heard some snickers from the crowd.

"Campers can stay if you want and gods, don't you have jobs to do?" I asked.

Some of the campers left and the gods looked a little disapointed and disapeared.

"Last one is-" I started.

"Can I do this?" asked Waffles; batting her eyelashes and making her oddly creepy (in my opion).

"Fine but don't use the baby voice."

"You mean this," her voice going a pitch higher.

"Too late," I sighed.

"Maker0914 says:

'i dare percy to drink 10 dyonis levle gins and then dance to im sexy and i know it

i truth nico if he likes thalia'"

"How come you don't have to do any dares?" Percy asked.

"Um... No one asked me," I answered. "I don't like where this is going."

"Ah ha, revenge!" shouted Clarisse.

"Viewers, send gilly boy some dares!" said Rachel.

Uh oh.

"Can we move on to maker's dares please; Percy, here's a jug. While you drink, Nico do you like Thalia?"

"No," he said simply.

Percy handed the jug back and danced; although he was swaying a bit.

"That's it for today's episode, Bye!"

**A/N: Rachel's with us! Now you can dare her, plus Waffles and me after that little spat apparently. Have a nice life!**


	4. episode 4

"Welcome back everybody-" I started.

"I can do karate," said Waffles karate chopping a pillow that Liam was holding up. "Ow," she fell over, face first and didn't move for a minute before popping up; dancing crazy.

I tapped her nose and dropped again.

"Looks like I found the off button."

Everyone was leaning over Waffles; she woke up with a start and waved her arms around; whacking Grover square in the nose.

Something gives the feeling that Waffles doesn't like Grover.

"Grover go backstage and have that looked at," I said.

"And make sure you bleed to death," added Waffles. Everyone looked at her shocked; I think she needs a therapist more than I do.

"I don't need a therapist, I am a therapist; can't you tell?" Pull stupid face, "All you have to do to calm down is inhale fastly!" she panted.

That was creepy.

"First up is all-star102938, she wants Nico to go in his underpants and sing I'm Sexy and I Know It."

"There is no way you're making me do that," said Nico.

"I couldn't agree more, but to see you be torn limb from limb by those fan girls. Would you rather end up like Thalia; those boys in there at least had some decency to restrain themselves, but the girls are a completely different story."

I think some the audience shuddered and Nico's eyes popped open, the fan girls are that bad.

Nico went backstage to strip down while the girls and I hid behind the desk. Thalia gave me an odd look.

"What, I don't want to see the opposite gender in their under wear." She nodded in understanding.

"Liam, is he off stage yet?" I asked.

_Yeah, you can come out now,_ he said.

I peeked over my desk to see a red faced Nico in skull underpants running off stage. "Oh gods Liam, I did not need to see that!" I heard him chuckle somewhere to my left; if he had a boy, I'd ring his pathetic neck. "I bet the Aphrodite girls and fans liked his little performance. Hold on, Waffles did you watch the whole thing?" I asked.

"Oh sure why not," she answered carelessly.

"Okay~, next is TheBlackPaperMoon:

'I want Percy to cross-dress as a girl and kiss Nico...Odd request, I know -_-'"

"It's not that odd of request, my hypothesis is that further in will be even stranger dares," said Annabeth.

"Whatever wisegirl," ignoring glare. "Percy head on over to Aphrodite."

"How did you convince her to come?" asked Conner.

"Uh goddess of beauty, duh," I answered.

"Makes sense," said Rachel.

Percy came back a few minutes later with a light blue dress and make-up on; Travis whistled which earned him a glare.

"How do girls even wear this?" complained Percy.

"Oh relax Perce, at least it wasn't a skirt," I said.

"That would be even worse," said Clarisse.

"How come?" asked Nico.

"'Cause there more easily flipped," said Thalia. "For any of male viewers out there; do NOT flip a girls skirt, they will slap you unconscious."

"They can't really slap a person unconscious, can they?" asked Grover nervously.

"That depends on the girl and how mad she is," answered Annabeth. Looking at the crowd, some the guys scooted away although some took their chances.

Percy gave Nico a kiss to the forehead, making him sigh in relief.

"Um, you can take that off now," I said.

"Actually this is quite comfortable," replied Percy.

"You're kidding, right?" said Annabeth.

"Yeah, I'd better take this off while I still have dignity."

"What dignity?" taunted Clarisse.

"Are you trying to pick a fight?" I sighed. "Don't answer that," when she was about to retort. "Time for the next set of dares, this is from Andronika23 saying:

'How many dares do you need? Cuz I have some.  
Percy:Catch a fish from the ocean,cook it(doesn't have to be you Perce),AND EAT IT!(mauhahha!)  
Annabeth:Hold a spider in your hand for 5 sec.  
Nico: (Fav person TO TORTURE!Sorry:) ) Dress up as Lady Gaga,get up on stage,and sing one of her songs. (It was either this or dying his hair pink. :/ )  
Grover:Eat one chicken enchilada.  
Hmm. I just noticed most of my dares are torture. *sighs* Gravity Falls all over again.'

There is not limit for how many dares and Gravity Falls is okay (I have an interest for the supernatural). Percy go catch yourself a trout and Annabeth meet Oreo."

Percy left the stage and Annabeth looked like she going to have a heart attack when a Tarantula crawled on the desk.

"Oreo remember our agreement, no biting Annabeth or else you won't get your treat," I said.

"She losing it," whispered Travis to Conner.

Oreo crawled onto Annabeth's outstretched hand while the rest of us counted down. Hitting zero, Annabeth got the creeps, thus dropping Oreo.

"You did awesome Oreo, here's a cookie," I said placing an oreo on its back.

"You're encouraging a spider," said Nico.

"So? Go be Lady Gaga… Wait, have you seen Waffles?"

"No," said Grover.

There was snoring backstage. "Oh, never mind then."

Nico came back a few minutes later with everything Gaga, including the make-up. Liam handed him the lyrics to 'Boys, boys, boys'; he made a face but sang anyway.

Percy came back with a tuna, Liam took it backstage for Waffles to cook once he kicked her awake. Before she seasoned it, Waffles slapped Percy with the fish and ran away. I think Nico's bad singing put her in a mood.

Waffles came back with an uncooked tuna covered in sprinkles and slapped Percy with it again. Now the side of his face was coated with colorful little dots.

"What did I ever do to you?" asked Percy.

"You slapped me with a fish," Waffles answered.

"Percy there's no point in arguing with her; Liam cook the fish," I commanded.

_But I never cooked a day in my afterlife_, said Liam.

"So, you've gotta be better than me and while you're at it make some chicken enchilada for Grover."

Grover perked up at the word 'enchilada.'

**Twenty minutes later…**

Percy looked at hesitant while Grover gobbled the enchilada. Waffles singing the word and dancing crazy like; Percy took a bite. From the look on his face, he did not like it.

"I am Sophie daughter of Apollo has some dares she wants to share: 'How about a dare! Annabeth has 2 flirt with:  
Connor  
Travis  
Nico'  
Gorver  
for the next half an hour IN FRONT of Percy, Katie and JUNIPER!  
Percy has 2 kiss clarisse for 30 seconds.  
It sux people are reporting the story!  
Bye!'"

Was it just my imagination or did Annabeth have a bug eyed look? "Let's do Percy first."

He got up and kissed Clarisse on the cheek; here's my suggestion if you want to see some fireworks, be a little more specific where to kiss.

"Liam, did you get Juniper?" I asked.

_Yeah, but do you have any idea how heavy she is?_ Replied Liam.

"No but you have to take her back after this. Hey Katie, if you're sitting in the audience; come on up!" A girl got up from her siblings and making her way on stage.

Annabeth took a deep breath and flirted to her heart's content, I have no idea what she said, it's all Greek to me. Percy looked ready to punch somebody or start a really long argument with his girlfriend; Katie frowned; and Juniper was FUMING. If she was given the chance, she probably would have dragged Grover by the horns and given him a really long lecture. Typical Nymph.

"chinfevl1203 says: 'You should dare Nico to talk about mythomagic for 30 minutes  
and Annabeth to sit on Percy's lap as Nico talks  
Clarisse to wear a Pink dress with make up  
Thalia to burn a Replica of her Death to Barbie T-shirt while wearing a pink I LOVE BARBIE T-shirt  
Grover to wear an I HATE NATURE t-shirt will holding garbage that causes pollution  
Connor and Travis to admit their feelings to the girl they like infront of everyone'"

Nico seemed to get younger and Annabeth rolled her eyes before sitting on Percy. While brought a pillow.

**30 minutes later…**

I woke up to the sound of snickering; still groggy, I opened my eyes. I was covered in whip cream and sprinkles! "Waffles! When I'm done with you, I'm gonna make you wish you were never born!" They were laughing at cream covered face! "You guys didn't stop her from turning me into a cream pie!"

"We needed a laugh after that sleep fest," said Clarisse with a shrug. Nico made a face at her, while I was chasing down Waffles. The Stolls were stuffing a whip cream dispenser and sprinkle tube in the sofa.

**10 minutes of chasing Waffles later…**

"Waffles, when we get home, I'm gonna kill you," I called.

"Yay!" she cheered backstage.

"Why do I even bother making threats," I sighed. "Clarisse just put on the dress and Thalia set that shirt on fire." The fire pit rose up, Liam handed the shirts to Thalia along with giving the shirt and trash bag to Grover. Which he held with his thumb and forefinger (keep in mind, it smelled really bad).

"So Conner and Travis, since we're already on national TV, who and what are your feelings for a certain girl?" I asked.

Before they could answer, Clarisse walked in; Aphrodite must've had a lot of fun because you couldn't even tell it was her. Her hair had clips pinning it out of the way so you could see the art work miss love put on. She had a light blush and blood red lipstick, the black mascara made her eyelashes longer and brown eyeliner.

Clarisse's dress was a strapless cotton-candy pink with a sweetheart neckline. A black belt wrapped nicely around her waist sealed with a red heart buckle. Black ribbons lined the edges of the dress. (Waffles designed this; I have no idea what I'm talking about)

Someone in the crowd whistled.

Clarisse scowled but sat down anyway; back to the Stolls.

"I'm a free man; so I'm available. You ladies watching, give me a call and we'll have a pizza later," said Conner.

"That wasn't what I asked," I said. "I asked who that special girl is."

"I don't got one."

"Figures, Travis who is you special girl?"

"It didn't say that on the review, so I don't have to tell who but I what I feel," said Travis.

Crap, he's craftier than I thought.

"And you've got to work on you pick pocketing."

Okay, I'm impressed. Much to my dismay of getting nicked (you British people know what I'm talking about) by a kid, although you could make the argument that he is the son of a thief.

"Back to the dare; this feels more like a talk show every day," I muttered to myself.'"Well she can make anyone have that growing felling inside just by smiling and eyes that sparkle with life," said Travis.

"It's Aphrodite, isn't it?" I asked.

"No," he scuffed.

"Whatever you say, next is Forgotten Moments who says 'I dare Grover to go hug a cyclops from Poseidon's underwater forges. Then proceed to wear a yell cocktail dress and ride Blackjack while screaming "Run! Run! It's horrible! There's an invasion of-of-of TURKEYS!" Percy then yells at him for stealing Blackjack.

Percy: I dare you to dress up as one of Santa's elves, but with an addition of a pink tu tu. Then you must take a ferrie to Victoria, Canada and bingee jump of the Capilano Suspension Bridge while singing Kelly Clarkson's I Do Not Hook Up at the top of your lungs.

Annabeth: I dare you to model for Trvis, Conner, and Percy. The outfits must be made by Aphrodite herself. You must model a casual outfit that consists of a skirt, a bikini, and lastly, an evening gown.

Thalia: I dare you to turn every demigod boy in Camp Half-Blood into a jackalope. Then sing Baby by Justin Beiber to Chiron and then proclaim your love for pencils to Hermes.

Nico: I dare you to wear a completely pink, frilly, and sparkly outfit by Aphrodite herself and then after, still wearing the outfit, ask Ares if he would go on a date with you. If he doesn't agree, go sulk to Hades and if he agrees, take him to Mozart's Puck in Hawaii.

Clarisse: I dare you to dress up in one of those Victorian dresses with the big, powdered wig, powdered face, a lot of make up, and all that. Then ask the Ares cabin what they think of the outfit while imitating a New Jersey accent.

Rachel: I dare you to eat a 5 course buffet made by Waffels. You have to eat ALL of it with only a little bit of help from Percy. Afterwards, you have to hump into a swimming pool filled with pudding, then cover yourself in whipcream. Have Travis, Conner, and Nico throw cherries, sprinkles, marshmellows, and any topping. You can't clean up afterwards. Anyone is welcomed to eat from the pudding pool.

Waffles: I dare you to start waltzing with a juffin before changing it into the flamingo. Then eat the muffin and spit it out onto Thalia's face. Then start running for your life away from Thalia.

Liam: I dare you to wear a light pnik tu tu and do ballet in front of everyone, that includes all the gods, minor gods, nature sperits, and demigods fron CHB.

gilly boy: I dare you to dress up like Nico before the dare I gave him and sing Boyfriend by JB to Dionysus and then ask Hades if he would wash Percy's underwear.'

Um Stolls, this one is for your eye's only."

They had huge grins on their faces. That can_not_ be a good sign!

No time to dwell on that. "Since I don't know many Cyclopes from the forges, I just called in Tyson. Oh Tyson!"

An over sized kid bounce up on stage. I think Waffles will like him.

Grover seemed to relax a lot and gladly gave Tyson a hug and went backstage to change. Few minutes later, in a yellow sun dress riding on Blackjack; although I wouldn't call it riding, more like a Pegasus rodeo. Blackjack was bucking everywhere, trying to shake Grover off; while he was trying to say "Run! Run! It's too horrible! It's an invasion of-of-of TURKEYS!"

"Run! Run for your lives!" screamed Waffles.

"From what?" asked Annabeth.

"I don't know, RUN!" (Waffles)

Percy looked pissed as Tartarus. Thankfully I pushed Percy backstage into Liam's ghost; of course he passed right through him. The only reason I knew he was there was because of a floating elf costume.

Percy grudgingly put it on and left the building; he'd better come back in one piece, Hera will need him later. Annabeth immediately started sketching, she must be really looking forward to seeing the in a dress.

"I can't turn males into jackalopes," said Thalia.

"Have you ever tried?" asked Grover.

"Well… No, but…"

"Would you like to go to the fan room again?" I said.

"No!" shouted Thalia, then her face twisted into concentration.

I'm not gonna go into details, although Rachel looked a little green (green, get it? XD Never mind -.-) watching. Where Travis, Conner, and Nico used to be, jackalopes had taken their place; The Stolls were brown with reindeer horns all they needed now was a shiny red nose and they could pass off as a miniature versions of Rudolf; Nico was black with deer horns.

"I guess I can turn people into jackalopes," said Thalia.

"BUNNY RABBITS! In Viking helmets," cried Waffles before scooping up the Stolls and Nico to a hug/squeeze them to death.

"I can't breathe," gasped Nico.

"Crap, I was going to ask to borrow your jacket Nico." I said.

_No worries sis, there's a replica in the back_, assured Liam.

"You're a life saver bro. Oh and Thalia, here's the mic," handing it to her.

Before she could sing, a jackalope appeared on screen. It was pure white with elk horns; even though it was cute, it looked really pissed. My first thought: Demonic Bunny!

"Who in Hades' name turned me into a rabbit?!" yelled Percy.

"She did it!" I said pointing an accusing finger in Thalia's direction. Which got me a glare before salt water was dumped on her.

"Wasn't me," said the Rabbit.

The water started forming ice crystals, and I think she was turning blue.

"That," began Percy," was me. Now change me back; it's bad enough I was a guinea pig."

Mm… One of these days I should invite Circe. "Uh, Thalia, go backstage and get yourself warmed up before you get hypothermia. Liam will provide the blanket."

_Alright! Some time with the ladies_, said Liam.

I merely stared at him (well that's assuming he was there); even when dead, he still has hormones. I couldn't help wonder if he ever watched the body changing video in the Underworld. Thankfully Thalia didn't hear that (perverted) comment.

Back to Percy, "Sorry Perce but you're not changing back 'til after the show."

"But what about my designs, I'm almost done," said Annabeth.

I nearly face palmed myself, crap forgot. "Finish those up, then we'll get Percy and the Stolls back to normal.

The jackalopes in the crowd all cried in protest, saying that monsters won't take them seriously. As said before, after the show.

Now back to Percy; he looks so cute in a tutu!

He already had the harness on, and hopped off; it surprised me that he didn't break his spine immediately; I guess he still had invincibility. Question, do you what a singing rabbit sounds like? Cause I couldn't tell if he was singing or screaming.

The screen pulled up and Thalia came back on stage. "Liam didn't try anything on you, did he?" I asked. The worst case scenario in my mind was her shouting "We're getting married!"

"No, why?" she asked.

"No reason. Finish up your dare, than Nico's got to wear something pink!" Okay so I couldn't resist squealing at that last part.

Waffles twirled a lasso that had a pretty pink outfit onto Nico, well that saves up time.

"What, I don't get an opinion?" said Nico.

"Apparently not," I answered.

"You look good in pink," chuckled Conner.

"How did Waffles get that dress over the antlers?" asked Annabeth.

"Who knows, even I'm afraid to look into her subconscious," I answered. People just trust me on this one, Waffles is scarier than Kronos.

Percy hopped in and looked at Thalia expectantly (arms folded and tapping his rabbit foot).

"Done!" cried Annabeth.

"Alright, give that to Aphrodite, while I take pictures of Nico just because he looks so cute as a bunny!"

"Help me!" cried Nico getting chased under the couch.

**5 minutes later…**

"Wow that was fast," remarked Rachel.

"I know, but what can I say, I work best with fashion," said Aphrodite before flashing out in an overwhelming perform cloud.

The boys on stage were already changed back and, thanks to Aphrodite, in the clothes that Annabeth designed.

Percy was in a nightgown that looked like it was from the Disney version of Peter Pan (the one Wendy wore). Travis was in a white bikini (here's the link: imgres?q=bikini&start=137&num=10&hl=en&biw=1366&bih=599&tbm=isch&tbnid=_kcgXfSByEfj3M:&imgrefurl= . &docid=25U1JIdnxW-tuM&imgurl= . /_yCREceCY9Z0/TIhipVEm3XI/AAAAAAAAAMg/3cuCJ5l1ZC4/s1600/celebrity%252Bbikini% &w=424&h=572&ei=89BUUP78HKKciQL94IGgCw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=842&vpy=98&dur=2222&hovh=261&hovw=193&tx=88&ty=285&sig=118024013382454076299&page=5&tbnh=133&tbnw=102&ndsp=36&ved=1t:429,r:15,s:137,i:272) and Conner had a blue layered skirt and a sleeveless wrap blouse (not my design either).

"Look out below!" cried Waffles, jumping from the catwalk and landing on Percy. He definitely would've broken something if it hadn't been for Achilles' curse.

"What are you trying to do? Kill someone?" I shouted.

"Maybe," said Waffles before skipping off stage to do who-knows-what.

Handing Thalia the microphone again, she yelled "This song is for Chiron!" When she finished, the crowd was wild (she must really be popular). "I'm Thalia Grace and I love pencils!"

"That was excellent! Nico, go ask Clarisse's dad on a date."

Clarisse had a look of disgust as Nico walked out. Oh crap, I just remembered that my dare was before Nico's. Jumping out of my seat and ran backstage and switched jackets; grabbing the mic from Thalia and sang. Waffles was rolling on the floor screaming "Make it stop! Make it STOP!" although I think I did okay, no one else was complaining.

Before running off to Hades, someone asked "What's got her in a rush?" No time for that now; quickest way to Hades is the elevator, with the fee from Charon. Thankfully the demigods only had to pay one gold drachma to watch. Don't judge me, how else am I going to pay for Hermes delivery service?

Ignoring the creepy underworld and sprinting at full speed; banging on the door and yelling "Yo Hades, open up!" the door finally opened and there sat Hades and Persephone. They were obviously in a heated discussion and not paying attention.

"Yes Nico, what do you want?" asked Hades.

Do I seriously look like Nico?

"I was wondering if you could wash Percy's underwear."

He turned to look at me. "You're not Nico."

Thanks for stating the obvious.

Next thing I knew, I was enveloped in shadows; it happened so fast that my mind couldn't process that I was sitting on Clarisse. What the-? I'm a girl too, is Hades trying to play matchmaker without Aphrodite knowing? 'Cause if he is, he's doing a terrible job of it.

Scrambling off too quickly results with a face slam to the floor; "Ow," I moaned, rubbing my nose. "Let's just check in with Nico, can you hand me a bandied Liam?"

The screen came down and showed Ares watching TV? Either he was watching my show or some sappy soap opera.

Nico walked in, "Hey Ares, want to go on a date?"

Ares was startled by the question or that someone dared to interrupt his TV time.

"No."

Nico seem pretty happy about the rejection because he was skipping out of the room like the little girl he's dressed as. He shadowed traveled to Hades and Hades (I mean the god) looked at Nico as if he sprouted two heads.

"Who are you and what have you done with Nico?" asked Hades, and then the screen pulled up.

"While he sulks, Stolls you're up!"

They smiled mischievously. "Don't worry, we've got this covered," said Conner before running off.

"Yeah we're experts at this," said Travis before running after his brother. I feel sorry for the poor guy.

"Clarisse, while they're doing gods-knows-what, you can go dress up."

"Yay, dress up!" cried Waffles jumping up and down like a happy school girl.

"Whatever," Clarisse grunted before going backstage. A minute later, she came back looking like the villain in 'Barbie as the Island Princess.' Wow Aphrodite works fast. To make things easier, the Ares cabin was sitting in the crowd. "What do you think?" she asked.

Her whole cabin booed and thumbs down, some shouted "That belongs in Tartarus!"

Clarisse face flushed by anger and embarrassment, she stumped off.

Time to get Nico, well almost; "Waffles, get cooking!"

**One hour later…**

"Is something burning?" asked Grover.

"Oh, that happens all the time," I replied. "Liam, bring in the food!"

_Whatever it is, it smells horrible_, said Liam. I'm guessing his nose is in the air of the other direction.

First meal was an old newspaper, second was a piece of wood on fire (thankfully Percy put out the flame), third was a deep fried boot with slugs, fourth one was tank full of gold fish with the instruction to eat the bowl not the fish, and last was an unconscious Waffles (face on the platter with her butt sticking up) with an asparagus in her mouth.

"There's no way in the world I'm eating all this, especially not Waffles!" shouted Rachel. "She is just an innocent little girl."

"Are you people blind? She's the incarnation of the devil! Do you have any idea of the horrible things she's done?"

"So I was a good girl?" asked Waffles.

Another face palm for her stupidity; wait if Waffles is standing by the door, then who's on the plate? We all looked between the two. "Please don't tell me some one cloned Waffles, its bad enough I have to deal with one," I said.

"Manikin power," cried Waffles.

"Whatever Waffles," I sighed. "Rachel, seems like you're not going to do the dare, off to the fan room!"

She shrugged, "It can't be that bad."

**Few minutes later…**

"I was wrong! Those fan boys are way bad," cried Rachel. She wasn't as bad a condition as Thalia but she still looked messed up. "When this is over, I'm suing those boys!"

"Take a deep breath and calm down," soothed Annabeth.

"While Annabeth tries to relax Rachel; Liam it's your turn and, to be honest, I did not expect you to get any dares." I said.

_Thanks for the confidence, sis_, he replied. The sarcasm was very thick.

Assuming that Liam is backstage, I made some phone calls. Soon there was a full house, may I should have done the show in the coliseum.

Out came a floating tutu. Actually, he was hiding behind the door.

_Can't I go into the fan room instead?_ He asked.

"Nope, Waffles and I had to do it. So you have to do it too," I answered.

_But your both girls, of course you'll be into this stuff._

"I don't care, now move it before I personally take you the Fields of Punishment! And don't worry; nobody will see how red your face will be."

That got him moving, muttering _No one can see me at all._

"Don't you think that was a bit harsh gilly," asked Percy.

"No."

When the performance was over, Liam got off stage as quick as he could.

"Waffles, your turn," I said, handing her a muffin.

"Yay," said Waffles, already in a flamingo costume. How does she do that? Waltzing with a muffin was easy for her but she put the whole muffin in her mouth. Instead of spitting it on Thalia like she was supposed to; Waffles threw a pie at her which still resulted in getting chased. She's still going to the fan room but not right now.

"Last one for tonight, this is from all-star120938. This guy wants me to do a jig; oh if you're watching all-star, mind if I call you that, I call everybody guy so don't be offended." I reassured, while doing the running man off stage. "Thank you and good night!"

**A/N: Ow my hands hurt, this is the most I have ever written (at least 4,000 words). Before forget, stop talking behind my back; where ever you are. Seriously are you trying to give me a cold? One more thing, all the randomness that happened was Waffles' idea, I just approved of it. Also Waffles wants more dares for herself. Don't worry if I forgot to do you, I'll get them next episode. To help my writing, give me some constructive crisism. Bye!**


	5. episode 5

"Stolls get back here so I can tear you apart."

"Uh, what's wrong with gilly?" asked Nico.

"Remember Forgotten Moments' dare?" asked Rachel.

"How could I forget, she had me bungee- jumped in Canada," said Percy.

"And you had to do it as a rabbit too," chuckled Thalia, which got her a glare from Percy.

"Well Travis and Conner's dare was to redecorate the room and replace her clothes," informed Annabeth.

"Don't forget the perfume and petals," said Travis.

"Yeah, it smelled like something died in there until we came, "commented Conner. "And don't get me started on her clothes, half of them were dresses!"

"That means less work for us," both high fiving each other.

"Shut up already and get started; and Conner, you did not make it smell better, it smells worse than ever!"

"One more thing, your room is messier than Percy's cabin," said Conner.

"Hey!" protested Percy and I in unison then gave each other a quick glance. Conner really had to squeeze that in there, didn't he?

"I thought girls were natural clean freaks," said Nico. "Just look at the Athena and Aphrodite cabins."

"Since when were you a stereotype; just get to the dares, TheBlackPaperMoon says:

'I dare all the gods to come and watch this episode LIVE.

I dare gilly boy to jump off a cliff and say "I CAN FLY!" on the way down

I dare Rachel to give a gold star sticker to EVERYONE in the WORLD!

I dare Percy to confess his love for Athena (Eww O.O) in front of Annabeth, Poseidon, and Athena, without them knowing of the dare. Then for him to confess his love for sushi too.

I dare Nico to GIVE ME A HUG! X3

I dare Travis to eat a toothpick

I dare Connor to throw skittles at Zeus and say "TASTE THE RAINBOW LIGHTNING MAN!"

I dare Thalia to read all the Twilight books. AND WATCH THE MOVIES! X3

I dare Annabeth to do a bubblegum advertisement.

So yeah, those are my dares. I hope they're...Amusing. XD'"

"You rang," a voice boomed behind me and making me jump out of my seat. I don't think I'll get used to that anytime soon.

"Welcome gods, one and all; go ahead and make yourself comfortable while I fall to my death." I said.

Annabeth gave me a look of suspicion just because I said it so casually.

**Time lapse…**

Already on the cliff and looking over the edge; did I mention I'm kind of afraid of heights? Taking a deep breath, l leapt. "I CAN FLY!" Last thing I saw was Waffles also jumping off and singing "I believe I can fall." Instead of falling, she flew away, since when did she have built in Daedalus wings?

**Third POV**

The entire screen showed was static; everyone was silent, except for Hermes' cellphone.

"Hello?" answered Hermes. He was silent for a moment before an ear to ear grin appeared. "Excuse me Lord Zeus but I've got work to do." He flashed out before Zeus could answer. Heighten Annabeth's suspicion.

"She can't really be gone, can she?" asked Grover, biting his nails.

"Actually gill…" the rest was muffled by something unseen, than Nico nodded in understanding. "Liam said he'll check the Underworld and for us to continue the dares."

"I guess this will take a while," said Rachel giving everyone in the building a sticker; "one building down the rest of the world to go."

"You do that, I'm giving someone a hug," said Nico, both walking off stage.

Annabeth was deep in thought, something didn't add up. Liam stopped Nico from saying something about gilly and Hermes immediately left after her disappearance.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Percy who shouted "I love you Athena!"

Athena looked ready to tear her hair out, Annabeth's jaw dropped and Poseidon looked confused. "And I really, really like sushi," although his expression said otherwise.

Nico shadowed-traveled here before a fight could break out between the four. Then he made a face like something he ate didn't digest well. "Liam said he was trying to get your attention for eight minutes." It was then that everyone noticed a board that read 'gilly's in the Underworld' hanging just above their heads.

"Yep, she's gone," said Thalia. "I'm outa here."

Then the lights went off, some of the mortals in audience used their cellphones as a flashlight.

"Did I miss anything?" asked Hermes just flashing in.

"Obviously," said Artemis, rolling her eyes.

"Who turned off the lights?" asked Athena and Annabeth.

"I did," said a voice.

The temperature of the room dropped several degrees, the emergency lights came one (a purple light) and revealed a glowing figure in a hood that completely covered its face. All the doors slammed shut and the audience began to panic.

"Enough!" yelled the figure. "I am here them!" pointing at the people on stage. "I am the ghost of gilly boy; you have disrespected me in life, now you must pay in death."

"The special effects here are amazing," said Ares happily munching on his popcorn.

Everyone on stage paled, the Stolls especially.

"We're sorry for messing with you room and whip cream," said Travis.

"Forgive us, they were just harmless jokes; we didn't mean to discourage you in anyway," said Conner. They were practically begging now, and they were supposed to be heroes.

Gilly's ghostly hand raised to strike and both Stolls had their eyes shut, preparing for the hit but nothing came. There was laughter, lots of it.

"You should have seen the looks on your faces, priceless! I honestly didn't think that would work, I was stone bottom wrong. You people actually thought I was dead, ha. I'm not that stupid to commit suicide," said gilly.

"That was a really sick joke," said Percy with a frown.

"I think I peed myself," said Grover.

"Yeah, I know I'm sick. Actually my family is jacked up in some way; Waffles I think you already know, Liam is just dead, and me… actually I'm not quite sure yet, mad genius maybe?" pondered Gilly; "Oh well, no time for that now," taking off the hood.

**Gilly's POV**

It feels good to be back; let me tell you how that joke was put together. I gave Hermes a call to do the effects like the doors slamming and to replace the emergency lights with black lights to give me that glowing appearance. Plus, now we have a trap door on stage. Liam and were in on it too. Liam so that he'd say I was dead and because I borrowed his cloak; Nico because he was about to give it away. Did I miss anything? Oh yeah, Liam also shut off the camera for my jump and turned down the temperature. Am I done now? I think I got everything.

"Where did you give TheBlackPaperMoon a hug, Nico?" I asked.

"Oklahoma," he replied.

"Okay then," I said awkwardly, now I'm starting to wonder why I asked. "Travis, go to the fanroom."

"What but I didn't get to do my dare." Travis complained.

"Sorry but I don't want to pay your medical bill and I don't think that nectar is gonna cut it either; besides if you go to the hospital, your mom can sue me."

"True but you said that you make sure it happens," countered Travis.

"Yes and…" at this point, I was drawing blank; "just don't do it."

_Too late for that_, said Liam, as Travis swallowed a toothpick. It's official, I'm screwed.

The phone rang and I had to pick up, on the other end was an angry Ms. Stoll. I had to put a gap between me and phone, she was so loud. "Sorry Ms. Stoll, I wasn't even aware of Liam… excuse me! I can't even see the retard and you're blaming me... How am I supposed to keep track of where he is!? I hardly touch him without passing through... Yes I can talk to him but that's mentally, Nico is the real person you should ask with a ghost problem. All I can do is threaten the guy... That's it; if you don't like the way I run things, than don't watch!" I hung up angrily; I turned and smiled at the guests. "Some technical difficulty, nothing to worry about; Liam could you get Conner some skittles."

_Way ahead of you._

While talking, I failed to notice that Conner already had a box and was munching on a few. Unfortunately, I also lost the gods' attention. Being 3,000 years old at least, must have seen every type of show out there.

Well this ought to wake them up.

"TASTE THE RAINBOW LIGHTNING MAN!" Yelled Conner (I personally would've gone with THUNDER HEAD!). Most of the gods were not paying attention; in fact one or two of them were sleeping (*cough* Poseidon and Athena *cough*), were startled by the sudden noise.

"Who threw these- oh skittles," said Zeus. Well that was totally out of character.

"Thalia, get to reading and is there a movie theatre nearby?" I asked the crowd.

"Yeah, there's one six blocks from here," said Percy. For a moment, I was picturing Percy the human GPS commercial. 'If you get lost, who are going to call? Percy Jackson! The human GPS device that will find you anywhere in the world! Only $5.99 on weekends,' wow that was some messed up imagination.

Speaking of commercials, "We will return shortly after this special announcement; in other words, commercial break." The crowd groaned, "Yeah, yeah, I hate them too. The good thing is Annabeth is doing it. This program has been brought to you by Explosion bubble gum, have a party in your mouth." (Wow, this feels unoriginal in so many ways.)

Annabeth went center stage and popped a piece of gum in her mouth. The camera zoomed in to the mouth. There was a party with beach balls and everything. She blew a bubble; right when it popped, the logo appeared (along with the word 'new').

Then a huge pile of gum fell on stage, Waffles appeared on top, yelling "Surprise!"

"I honestly didn't plan for this and I don't think anyone on stage chews gum. Feel free to take it." I said, tossing the gum into the crowd. There is still a lot left over; viewers watching, for sticking with me this far. You receive free bubble gum!

"Next set of dares is from Lawliet (mind if I call you that?) It says-"

"Can I do it?" asked Waffles, giving me her biggest puppy dog eyes.

I hate it when she does that. "Fine, make it quick."

"It says 'Ok...  
Percy I dare you to make Hades resurrect Zoë, then kiss her for 10 minutes in front of Artemis and Annabeth  
Annabeth I truth you if you would prefer dating Luke to Percy  
Thalia I dare you to knee Apollo where it hurts  
Nico I dare you to crush a flower in front of Persephone  
Zeus I truth you how many times did you cheat on Hera  
Poseidon I dare you to kiss Athena  
Hermes and Apollo I dare you to kiss the Minotaur at the same time'" Wow, faster than I thought.

Not sure how Hades will agree and isn't Zoë in the night sky?

"Hey Hades!" yelled Percy, getting everyone's attention. Hades looked like he didn't want be here; no wait, he's always like that. Little surprised that Percy would step up so fast, is he looking forward to the kiss? "Uncle Hades, could you temporarily have Zoë here?"

Hades pondered for a moment, think it over. "If I don't agree?" he asked before getting shocked.

We all turned to Thalia.

"Don't look at me, I didn't do it," she said, turning to Zeus.

"As much as I would like to, you've got the wrong person."

"Well you are the only other one with the power of lightning," I said. I got my answer when Waffles popped up behind Hades with teaser gun in her hand. Is there a police man here that I should know about? "Somebody catch her!" I yelled. Jumping off stage; it lasted for a good 15 min. 'til we finally caught Waffles and chained her to my desk. "Ha, let's see if you wonder off now." That was my lamest teasing ever. Next thing I knew was an empty chain in my hand. "And she wondered off."

"After all that, she still gets away," said Nico, in a little aw.

"Yep, we're just gonna have to deal with it," said Clarisse.

Back to the dare; "Right, sorry Hades about the teaser, as an apology. I give you Waffles."

He smiled wickedly (more like a death grin) at all the torture ideas; the rest of us were busy finding a hiding place. Explanation: Waffles is a ticking time bomb of mass craziness!

Hades hollering was worse than anything in the world in the world. Note to self: next time Hades comes to visit, bring earplugs. Actually, do that with any god for that matter.

"You knew this was going to happen," demanded Hades. Peaking over the desk, Hades looked terrible (if not bad already). His rob of souls looked disoriented mostly.

"I had an idea, but this was not what I expected; will you bring Zoë back now or I will have Waffles maim you again," I replied. Out of the corner of my eye, Waffles was holding a whip and lightning flashed in the background. The freakiest part was the smile.

"Alright, but for 10 minutes, that's it." Zoë then appeared and looked around, not knowing where she was. Percy then gave a kiss to the check (still be a little more specific where the kiss should be), Annabeth seemed relieved that it wasn't to the mouth and Artemis wasn't paying attention (she fell asleep). Zoë was about to slap him after the kiss but disappeared before doing anything. Percy then went back to his seat.

"Annabeth, would you rather date Luke?" I asked.

She gave me a look, as if she had been asked that a million times before. "At one point," she answered Annabeth; adjusting her position so she'd lean closer to Percy.

"Good answer," a bit awkward. "Could someone wake up Artemis? I'm half betting she would want to see this." That's right people; I had put the gods to sleep except for Hades and Ares. Hades was still a little sore and Ares seems to be the only one enjoying it because of all the torture. This is why I brought in Waffles, to get rid of the boredom.

One of the guys in the audience gave Artemis a nudge to the shoulder.

"He had better be careful or Artemis will explode on him," said Grover, slightly fidgeting.

"Is it over?" asked Artemis. The guy started scooting away immediately.

"No, my lady, but you'll get a kick out of this," said Thalia, putting the bad pun aside, she jumped off stage with a well aimed foot at Apollo's groan.

Apollo is now able to sing like Alvin and the Chipmunks; Artemis (her expression looked like this :O) had her hands covering her mouth. "See what happens when you mess with my hunters." Apollo shot a quick glare but remained silent, not so awesome now are you?

"Hades, wake up Persephone," I said. Wow, mostly dialogue and no real action. "Here's a pansy for Nico."

Persephone rubbed her eyes groggily, opening her eyes to see Nico crushing the flower as if it was paper. Everyone ducked before she could go nova.

"Is it over?" asked Grover, peeking from behind the couch.

_Man, I didn't think the mistress was that bright_, said Liam.

"Be glad that's out of the way and I don't think I can dare the gods, as awesome as that may be, sorry Lawliet. Their just here to watch but I can do this," I said, jumping off stage and giving Zeus a wet dog kiss to the cheek.

"Ewe," everyone, (mortals, demigods, and gods) cried; as I climbed back upstage.

"Whatever; next is Waffles 100 to 1 who says 'On this show what an idiot I am! And why won't anyone dare me! And anyone who says I need serious mental therapy, your all probably right.' Waffles! I don't have time for this; here's the real one from Mowana, which he did two but I'm gonna combine them. It says 'i truth percy whut he thinks about him being gaurdian of artemis or the cammander of chaos's army while datingartemis or chaos(as a girl)

i dare rachel to say apollo suchs then say he should be called powo

i dare percy to become a jakealope and annabeth to kiss the jackalope on the lips and but :D'"

"Huh, does he mean that chaos is a girl or I'm the girl?" asked Percy.

"I don't know, I just read it," I answered.

"If Artemis was like Annabeth, then things may work out, but I don't think I will give up Annabeth for the world," said Percy, making Annabeth blush a bit.

"Okay~, Rachel is still giving stickers so I'll just give her a phone call," dialing the number.

"Yellow?"

"Hi, Rachel, you done with those stickers yet," I asked.

"No, but I'm halfway done with Australia then I'm heading to Japan."

"Really, awesome; when you're in Okinawa, could you say hi to a friend of mine."

"Sure, what does she look like?"

"Black hair and dark brown eyes can't miss her."

Everyone was quiet until Clarisse yelled "They all look like that!"

"Well sor~ry, but I haven't seen her in years." They probably want to strangle me right now so let's move on. "Anyway, Rachel you've been dared to say that Apollo sucks and should be a powwow."

"Okay~, Apollo sucks and should be a powwow toy," said Rachel casually.

"That's enough torture for Apollo today. Thalia we need your assistance."

"She didn't raise her head from the book, but with a flick of her wrist, Percy was once again a jackalope. Waffles pointed at him and yelled at the top of her lungs "Run away, it's a monster; in a Viking helmet." Didn't she already do that?

Annabeth carefully picked up Percy, even though he seemed cross (now I'm think of Bugs Bunny). They had a silent conversation before their lips connected; then she flipped him over, eyes closed and nose tickled under Percy's fuzzy tail. Making contact with the rear end; Percy's eyes bulged (you know in 'Bedtime Stories' how that Ginny pig's eyes are huge, yeah, like those) and Annabeth's head jerked back and visibly gagging.

Thalia flicked her wrist again, not taking her eyes off the book, which I think is the third one; Percy, when no longer a cute rabbit, he a tomato face.

"We will never speak of this," said Percy.

"It's too late for that, man," said Conner, pointing at the audience. All the campers were laughing, even the gods. I wasn't trying to hold back a grin either.

"Okay, next is IluvJesus who'd like us to perform 'Lol! I luv it! You could do a bit better in the spelling and/or the grammar. Good job, BTW! Ps. I agree. Waffles does need desperately a mental clinic. I dare waffles to... BE SANE FOR TEN MINUTES! I dare Percy to... JUMP OFF A CLIFF AND HAVE ZEUS SLOW HIS FALL, THEN HAVE ANNABETH CATCH HIM!  
Travis: Scare Connor for twenty minutes. Connor: Scare Travis for twenty mins.  
Rachel: DO MATH AND THEN HAVE RANDOM PERSON COME UP AND ASK HER THE ANSWER TO PROBLEM 56 on TEST 57 AND HAVE RACHEL PROPHISY (no idea how to spell it) THE ANSWER!' Hey! I'm dyslexic so cut me some slack there will ya." I called.

"Your dyslexic, are you sure you're a mortal?" asked Annabeth. "Do you have ADHD? Does Waffles have these symptoms?"

"Yes, no, and no; don't make such a big deal out of it, almost everyone here is dyslexic and compared to them mine is mild," I said.

"All right, your funeral," said Clarisse.

"At least we now know a possible demigod and have Waffles sane for once," said Grover. Wait a minute, if I'm a possible half-blood then why didn't Grover sniff me out earlier. Do I smell that bad (like how Percy under Gabe)?

Waffles fixed her monocle, top hat, and cane. "I am from flufflupuagis which is in flufflupagis, where I teach in the school of fluffleupagis," she said for the first minute. For the second and third minute she spun in circles; in the fourth and fifth, "Flufflupuagis is the champion in qualiponing and sluptupering. They won the qualiponing championship every year since October." Then talked about the periodic table "This is an element, and this is an element, and this is an element, and this is a turtle," the last three minutes was spent lying on the floor, died and tongue sticking out. Once the ten minutes was up, she went completely nuts; in a blink of an eye (I mean everyone blinked at the same time), all four walls were on the ground.

"Great, now we need to change buildings," I muttered. Everyone moved to the one next door.

"This is the exact same building!" Nico yelled.

"I always have an extra building in case of Waffles," I explain, "Back to business.

"Well I best be hopping then," said Percy.

"You're not scared?" asked Annabeth.

"No, not when I know you're catching me," he replied, putting his arm around her. The audience cooed and one person held up a sign that read 'Percabeth 4ever!'

"Stop flirting and get moving! I'll wake up Zeus," I said, pulling out a horn. I've got to stop putting these people to sleep. The horn went off loudly and startled all the gods. "Hey Thunder Head, you've got a job to do. When Percy jumps, slow the fall."

"Why should I listen to a mortal like you?" asked Zeus.

"'Cause it will make you a better ruler if you listen to what the other person has to say," I squeaked. Hey, this is Zeus we're talking about here; with a snap of his fingers, he could turn me into a pile of ash.

"Now Zeus, be gentle, remember, mortals are fragile beings." I can't believe I'm saying this but thank you Hera!

"Fine," he muttered.

"Hey Perce, we're to go, Annabeth ready?" I radioed. While talking to Zeus, Percy and Annabeth had gone ahead; Liam handed them a radio so we can communicate.

"Yep, all set here," he replied. The screen came down and showed Percy doing a running start. He ran off, plummeting toward the ground. Zeus didn't seem to do anything about it; Percy didn't have much farther to go and was screaming his head off. I'm having a sense of déjà vu, its St Louis Arch all over again. Then he landed in Annabeth's waiting arms, the force knocked them down back-wards. Annabeth was silently cursing and Percy managed a smile.

"Let's give those two some privacy, now the Stolls' turn," I said.

"Oh that's easy," said Conner.

"We do that all the time at home," continued Travis. They ran backstage to prepare.

"While they're gone, let's give Rachel a call shall we," I said.

"Hello?" the voice of Rachel coming out of the speakers, bouncing around the room.

"Hi Rachel, it's us again. Listen sounds weird but we need you to do a math test."

"Math test? Are these fans mediocre or what?"

"I'm not done yet; a random person then asks you the answer to one of the problems and you have to answer using a prophecy. I really don't want to sit all day asking math questions so we'll just skip a few problems and get someone up here. Who would like to get a prophecy?" A lot of hands from the mortals shot up; the ambition to learn your fate never gets old (don't look at me like that, I do a bit of fortune telling to know what I'm talking about). "You, girl is the purple flower shirt."

"Given the isosceles triangle where AB=4x-3, BC=x+12, and AC=2x+5. The angles BAC and ACB are. Find AC?" she asked.

"_X is far for all to see, add and subtract equals they will be. Apply x where it stands, you will discover the answer you seek."_ The oracles' voice echoed throughout the building. Note to self: Never ask the oracle a question unless you can handle the creepiness. After a while, the phone went dead; must've run out of minutes.

"Now that we've got that out of the way, Conner and Travis should be done."

The Stolls came back. Both had someone with them; Travis had a woman and Conner had- Waffles?

"No way," started Conner. "Hilary Duff?" The woman, that Conner claimed to be Hilary Duff, smiled; showing razor teeth.

"Fury!" yelled Grover, taking cover. Transforming monsters well should've seen that one coming. Note: that is not the real Hilary Duff.

"This is for that prank you pulled a few years back," she cried.

"Is that Mrs. Dodds?" I asked. Grover shook his head from behind the couch as the Fury was chasing Conner around.

Waffles merely smiled, a smile that makes you know something's wrong. There was an almost silent _beep, beep, beep_ before Travis' pants exploded, he yelped in surprise. His face covered in soot and hair sticking out in all directions, one strand on fire. "Good thing I'm wearing flame retarded underpants," He said. Yeah, smiley faced ones.

"Okay~ awkward ways to scare but if we're done now; I'd like to move on to all-star, she has for us today 'Percy get's turned into a girl for the whole show but at random times he says girlie stuff and every hour he is changed into a different outfit like a dress  
Love your story as always and Thalia and Nico I won't do anything...Yet'"

"I don't like the sound of that," said Nico.

"Neither do I," agreed Thalia, coming back from the movie theatre. (I really need to keep better track of my guests.)

"But I do!" I said with a small smile and crazy look in my eye.

"One of these days, someone will put a restraining order on her," muttered Clarisse.

_It's a bit late for that_, said Liam.

"What do you mean?" asked Nico.

_Nothing, it's just she did something a while back that the real person in charge wasn't happy about. I wasn't there at the time so I can't give details._

"Can we just get to the dare and stop talking like I'm not here! Someone get Percy, my patience is already wearing thin." Well, speak of the devil; along with Annabeth.

Liam tapped Percy's shoulder, course all he saw was a sign that read 'In the change room, now.' He followed the sign backstage and after a few minutes of struggle sounds; Percy came back in a pink- wait a minute, is that my sundress?

"Liam! Care to explain why Percy is in my dress?"

_Hey, it didn't who was the design him so I took the liberty to search through your closet._

"You could have just grabbed one from the costume closet, you know," said Nico.

_Yeah, but I like this better. Mainly because it has some value to gilly and now she has bragging rights, I can imagine it right now._ The rest I didn't hear but whatever he said made Nico chuckle.

"Can I change now, my underwear is running up and this is so itchy." Said Percy; for those wondering, Liam had made him stuff something so he had a chest.

"You look good in a dress," said Annabeth, trying to suppress a smile.

"Ha-ha, very funny… Oh, you were serious?"

"I agree with Annabeth," said Clarisse. Clarisse and Annabeth agreeing on something, it must be the end of the world. "You make a very convincing woman."

"Then I should dress as a girl more often, NOT!"

"I have an idea but this might seem extreme; be right back," I said jumping off stage again. They watched carefully as headed towards Aphrodite, whispering my idea in her ear.

"Oh, this will complicate things between them," Aphrodite was giggling with excitement. With a flick of a figure, bright flash, Percy was no longer Percy.

"Folks, meet Percella," I said, although giving Waffles a weird look because she had a sideways hat and street clothes going 'word.' Annabeth was freaking out.

"I am not a lesbian!" Everyone is now staring at Annabeth, who was flushed with embarrassment. Everyone then turned their attention to Percella to see her reaction; unfortunately she fainted on the floor. At this point, I was back on stage and dumping water on her, which she instantly dried.

"What! Why? When! How! Huh? Oh, it's just you. Man, I had this nightmare where Aphrodite turned me into a gir- AH!"

"Relax Percella, it's only for this episode and during it someone's going to change your clothes and it's not going to be me." I said.

"I can change myself," he said, giving me a look.

"Yeah, but I don't trust you in that body so Annabeth. You are her girlfriend after all. Anyway next it Ukulele Pichu but first Percella, can you get Nico to the costume closet; Liam is already waiting with the armor." Before Nico could ask, Percella ushered him out the door. "She says 'I dare Nico to put on greek armor. Let him out and only let him in when your done reading this. Percy (Get Nico out of the room before reading this) Call Mrs. O'Leary( Did you know this was a name of a cow?!) to play get the greek using Nico. Let Nico in and let er chase him! Great job. I dare Thalia to(at least try) to turn Chiron into a full horse. I dare Annabeth to have tea with Percy's dad. And I dare Grover to beat Apollo in a Haiku contest( not much of an accomplishment.). BTW The irony is that Apollo's Kids are called _(forgot it) and are named the same thing as inspiration you get when writing a poem or haiku.'"

Percella gave a classic New York taxi whistle and Mrs. O'Leary came bounding in. It was that moment that Nico decided to walk in.

"Explain to me why I have to wear a chicken suit under Greek armor?" said Nico.

Clarisse and I were trying to suppress a smile, "'Cause your about to act like, better start running."

Nico turned about and there was Mrs. O'Leary nuzzling Percella. "Get the Greek," she yelled and pointed at Nico. He yelped, feathers flying everywhere as he ran off with the hellhound following close behind. Percella smiled, satisfied and went backstage to change out of my dress; Annabeth following and holding a blindfold.

"Your turn Thalia," I looked around in the audience and there was Chiron in mortal form (aka the wheelchair). Thalia then concentrated and only manage to change his head into a horse (he still had his arms). "Good attempt, could you please leave him like that, he looks way better that way." Chiron shot me a horse's glare which made look even more ridiculous. Then Percella and Annabeth came back, wearing skinny jeans and a blouse.

"Well I had better get going, c'mon Poseidon," said Annabeth, jumping off stage and dragging Poseidon by the arm; must be to that new café down the street.

"Gilly, you judge who is the better poet," commanded Apollo as he got on stage. Crap, it's Pan vs. Apollo all over again; if I don't choose Apollo, I may end up like King Midas (with the donkey ears, not the golden touch) or worse.

I was about to protest, when Apollo cleared his throat: _"The ladies love me,_

_It is true that I'm the best,_

_I am so awesome."_

Gee, a little self-centered much.

Grove: _"What more do I need,_

_Then a big crate full of cans,_

_High in minerals"_

Oh man, now they're both looking at me. "Um, do you want my honest opinion or the one you wanna hear?" They both chose the first, say goodbye gilly people. "Grover was better, sorry Apollo but you are a narcissus." I think that was the nicest way I could put it; Apollo did not like the response, he was about to blast me to pieces when Mrs. O'Leary came back in with Nico hanging by the tail feathers in her mouth. Apollo was momentarily distracted enough for me to slip away, leaving a note behind. When they turned back 'round, I was already gone.

**Third POV (sorry, a lot of changes)**

If they had looked at the computer set on the desk, it would've made sense that gilly left. Annabeth was smart enough to look on the screen, took her a moment to decode the words before saying them a loud. "Draco: Hi, i'm Draco and this is my yami Drago  
Drago: Yo  
DARES:  
gilly: your awsome take the day off  
Everyone(including the gods) give percy an atomic wedgie  
Nico: punch percy in the balls  
Thalia: Go kill Tiamat the bat queen and bring me her heart. (Just google her she is very hard to kill)  
Everyone: do the whole chapter in nothing but little kids underwear"

"That Draco is a perv. If he thinks we will be in kid's underwear," muttered Thalia.

"Wait there's more, a note from gilly. It says 'Well I'm screwed with now Artemis, Apollo, and Zeus, what other gods should I offend next? Anyway, by the time you read this, I'll be on the plane to Hawaii. Waffles is in charge, have fun!'"

"You're darn right your screwed, once I find you, I'll use my almighty power to turn you into the lowlife you are," said Apollo.

"Leave some of that action for me!" Zeus yelled, to blast the host out of the sky. Lucky Hera stopped him.

"She had better not make a speedy return," muttered Grover.

They now all turned to Waffles, who was now dressed in a commander's uniform, waiting to see if she will explode on them (wow, a lot of suspense going on here). "Attention! Line up! Not you private pudding (Percella), you will be standing up front and back turned."

"Yes ma'am," said Percella, suddenly thinking back to when she was in the military academy. Doing as she was ordered. "Now what?"

Waffles pocked him, spun around and then clamped her hands. Percella was now hanging on the catwalk by her princess castle undies (thank Waffles for that); Percella turned bright red. "Can someone get me down from here," be careful what you wish for Percella. She dropped with a loud thud.

"I'm next," shouted Ares, "this is for stabbing my ankle." Pulling with all his godly might; Percella's hollering echoed throughout the building, it was a horrible sound. Compared to that, the others went smoothly.

"I'm going to need surgery after this," she muttered.

"Well I'm outta here," said Thalia, heading out.

"She's gone, let's gossip about her," whispered Waffles.

Everyone ignored her and Nico sighed; got up and punched Percella where normally the suns don't shine. "Does Draco have a grudge against me?" asked Percella, trying to protect her used to be manhood.

"Do we have to wear little kids underwear?" asked Grover.

"We have to unless we all want to go to the fan room," said Annabeth. The people that did go, shuttered.

"Let's just change and get this over with," said Clarisse getting up and the others followed. They came back, stripped down although Liam offered the girls a bathrobe but turned it down. Percella now has a good view at the new body and was trying to cover her eyes.

"That's the last one, bye," said Annabeth, before covering the lens, then static.

**After the show…**

Gilly happily walked in with a flower necklace and a flower pinned on right side of her head (flower on the right: single, left: in a relationship, correct me if I'm wrong). Liam was busy putting up the decorations for the next episode and Waffles was taking a nap on the desk.

"Is everything ready Liam?" there was a pause. "Excellent, these viewers had better make some extra scary dares."

**A/N: Sorry it took so long, but I had a few set backs (the prophesy [Rachel actually helped me with my homework] and the haikus) and rearranging for this story. Are you aware of what episode will be next? ;-) Oh and you don't have to appologize so much Forgotten Moments, I just got worried. And before I forget, I got a bit enlightened on why not to do ToDs here: 'These have been banned since 2005, and the site removed all material that had the potential of inserting the reader into a fanfiction for various speculated reasons; one of the popular explanations may be child porn, due to the number of users who are under 18 and the oft-suggestive situations that the CYOA fics posed. In addition, parents could easily sue for "corrupting a minor" in allowing anyone to put themselves into a story that may have romantic or even sexual undertones.' That is why I now have a poll that asks you if I should continue hosting or have Chiron do it instead, check it!**


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